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life is a Funny Thing

Life is a funny thing. It can chew you up, spit you out, occasionally steal your hairbrush, but what makes you really want to shake your fist in its general direction is when you realise that, quite against your wishes, it has set itself to fast forward. Since when was it allowed to be April already? I’m fairly certain I did not give permission for this to happen. Continue reading →

Holiday at last!

Holiday at last. Well, almost. I’m back at my parents’ house a little early this year to help out with a radio play my dad is staging. The fact that I just said “staging” should be raising a few eyebrows. My dad is trying to recreate all the fun/insanity of watching a radio play being recorded live, including microphones, multiple parts, and that silly person knocking cups together to do the “live effects”. (That silly person, in this case, being me. Continue reading →

Writing a Novel You Will Need a Rack of Swords

Someone, somewhere is trying to kill me. I am quite convinced of this fact, to the point of installing a rack of swords next to my bed (more on that later) and chanting prayers to minor gods as I moved between lectures. Unfortunately, I suspect all this effort may well be in vain, as the person trying to kill me will almost certainly turn out to be… Me. Like snow in a Russian winter, the problem isn't one of impact, but accumulation. Lectures and supporting work? No problem. Continue reading →

The Corkboard is filled with Random Bits of Paper

On the wall above my desk, is a large cork-board. One half of this currently has on it a random jumble of bits of paper including my lecture timetable, a map of the university, the passcode for my wireless internet, and a picture of Prince William on a motorbike cut out of the Metro. The other side is my Quote Wall, a veritable library of amusing, interesting, or thought-provoking sentences I've heard members of the human race come out with. Continue reading →

Back Again

A month of summer to go, and I'm back in Southampton. My time away has been eventful (in parts), but there's something irreplaceable about walking down Portswood Road in my trampling-the-unworthy boots and just thinking, "I'm back". Said beloved boots have been a little neglected while I've been away. Continue reading →

Group Revision

At last, the end is in sight. Three exams have been beaten back, leaving just maths skulking in the corner, hissing menacingly. Come Tuesday, one of us will be a gibbering wreck. For now, I've got two more days to sharpen my lance and work out what in the name of engineering is up with the Laurant expansion. Maybe I should get the dream-team to explain it to me. On my course, we decided a while back that exams were a beast best conquered as a group. Continue reading →

Computer Systems Engineering Lab Partner

“Oh yes,” says my lab partner, taking his hand slowly off the dials of our laser-powered-communications-testy-ma-thing. “I am the MASTER of fine adjustments!” It had sort of got to that point. You can only spend so long meticulously observing “laser safety” before the insanity starts to creep in. It didn't help that we were all made to swear oaths of blood (alright, maybe just sign forms) promising the following: 1. I will not undertake any laser work without a supervisor. 2. Continue reading →

Writing My Own C# Game

I'm typing this on my netbook, surrounded by piles of a teenage boy's laundry. Next to me, someone is fighting off a combination of head-grabbing aliens and gas-mask wearing policemen (courtesy of Microsoft's Xbox360) while, somewhere in the distance, a King Charles spaniel snuffles around looking for a free meal. I must be home for Easter. There's always something a little weird about arriving back at the parents' house after being away all term. Continue reading →

There are Lies, Damn-Lies and Statistics, Or Maybe Not

Some people say there are lies, damn-lies and statistics. My computer systems lecturer disagrees. He says there are lies, damn-lies, statistics and benchmarks. After nearly a week spent slowly disappearing under a mountain of chips, wire and code, I've thought up a new one: There are lies, damn-lies, statistics, benchmarks and things-you-wrote-in-your-design-project-plan. The following explanation has been carefully stripped of any direct references to electronic engineering. Continue reading →